RUSSIAN WOMEN Q&A:

Why Russian Women Seek Husbands Abroad 
and why Russian women seek foreign men

by Elena Petrova (Elena's Models) and real Russian women

We asked real Russian women, members of Elena's Models, why do they seek a partner abroad and why they seek foreign men in general.

149 women answered and you can find their answers here. (These answers make the perfect addition to my recent article Why Russian Women Want Western Men?)

These are real answers from real women and they raise real issues that Russian women face in Russia, Ukraine and other countries of the former Soviet Union when seeking a man for marriage. Some women agreed to attach their names and photos to their answers, great thank you for that! 

The analysis of the answers (percentages, reasons hierarhy, by age/country etc) will be published soon.

Inna, 32 - Travel agent from Moscow, Russia (university graduate speaking 6 languages, never married, no kids): why I seek a husband abroad

Personally I decided to seek a husband abroad because: 
1) in Russia women significantly outnumber men; 2) men of my age are usually already married; 3) I appreciate western men's values.

Svetlana, 30 – economist from Prague, Czech Republic (MBA speaking 6 languages, never married, no kids): why I seek a husband abroad

Personally, for me "search for a husband abroad" means exactly that: I immigrated from Belarus to Czech Republic and I wouldn’t want to go back. From the other hand, frankly speaking, if I met my special man and he was Russian (or Russian-speaking, again, I don’t want to narrow down my search), I would get married to him but would try to convince him to move to Europe, because the most important thing, there is more freedom and ways to realize and develop oneself, which is also important for our future CHILDREN!

So, I am looking for a HUSBAND and not a "foreign husband"; I am looking for my soul mate and the father of my future children. His nationality is not important; things that are important are love, mutual respect, attention and effort to understand and support each other in any situation. These are not just words; this comes from the heart and it simply cannot be any different because no money or material things can replace intimacy and warmth. That’s been checked))

Besides, I speak several languages (English, German and Czech), which broadens my ability to find my future life partner. I try to travel as much as I can, visited most of Europe. I am a "woman of the world" and feel at home anywhere, so the definitions like "boundaries" and "foreigner" sound somewhat obsolete… I live in Prague right now. Prague is an amazingly beautiful city! I adore it! And of course there are many "pilgrims", tourists of all kinds seeking beauty. You can meet here people from all over the world. So, with time, it’s just natural to stop separating people into "ours" and "foreigners".

And Love, it’s universal for everyone; it always has been and will be, regardless of national borders. So, if my future husband lives overseas – well, Elena’s Models will help me to find him!

Natalia, 34 – teacher from Ukraine (university graduate, never married with 1 child): Why I seek a man abroad

I believe that if a woman is really looking for her soul mate and doesn’t have any hidden agendas, she won’t limit her search by a certain country. The search is worldwide, including her home country. Most important is to seek everywhere and something absolutely great will come out of it. It’s not important where it happens, in your own country or abroad, because happiness has no borders!!!!!

Sonya*, 25 – sociologist from Almaty, Kazakstan (university graduate, never married, no kids): why I am seeking foreing men

Frankly speaking, I would prefer a RUSSIAN husband :) But it didn’t happen so far. And I decided, well, if you look globally, all men are the same. Let me be here on the site; won’t hurt. Maybe something exciting will happen )

Anna, 28 – accountant from Ukraine (university graduate, never married, no kids): Why I seek a husband abroad

I'll be brief – because our men don’t want to take responsibility and don’t want a family, they are happy to date forever… they don’t have life goals and most of them are already married. I seek a husband (a man who would adore me) and it doesn't matter if he is Russian or a foreigner… a foreign man for a husband is not my goal. I just want to find a good man to marry and it doesn’t matter what nationality he is or where he lives))))

Lina*, 25 – Customer service manager from Kazan, Russia (university graduate, speaks 3 languages, never married, no kids): why I am seeking a husband abroad

I decided to seek a husband abroad after a long-term relationship with a German man. He lived in my city and although we broke up, I realized the world of difference between a relationship with a western man as compared to Russian men. Our men, I apologize for the expression, became totally arrogant. They are used to the fact that there are more women than men and feel that if not one then another will do "what I want, how I want it". There is no idea of mutual understanding or partnership; it’s just consumption.

Elena, 35 – engineer from Minsk, Belarus (university graduate, divorced with 1 child): Why I want to get married to a foreigner

I want to get married to a foreigner! Why?

- Men abroad marry later in life, they are more mature and think it through
- Foreign men’s family values are similar to mine
- By the time foreign men get married, they are accomplished in their lives and careers
- I want to live abroad!

Elena*, 44 – bank manager from Vladivostok, Russia (university graduate speaking 3 languages, divorced with 2 children): why I want to meet a foreign man

I tried to find a Russian man through Russian dating sites but could not find anyone suitable. Unfortunately, Russian men mostly seek some fun on the side; they don’t have goals and aspirations in life and are afraid of responsibility. I, on the other hand, seek a serious relationship. Russian men's mentality and attitude (not all of them but too many) are already an urban legend. It's either all the decent men are already taken, or I am just very unlucky.

Marina, 33 – sales manager from Almaty, Kazakhstan (college graduate, widowed with 1 child): Why do I look for a husband abroad

Why do I look for a husband abroad… because in my country most men of my age are already married. Or, if you take an average statistical 45-year-old Russian male and an average western male of the same age, there will be a huge difference. Western men exercise more, drink less and look younger. At 33 I am considered a middle-aged woman here, although I feel young and look great for my age. I believe that western culture values age differently. From my personal experience, I realized that I enjoy communication with western men much more. And certainly, I would like to leave Kazakhstan.

Lena*, 39 – engineer from Russia (university graduate, divorced with 1 child): why I seek a husband abroad

My ex-husband had problems with alcohol; we had been married for 18 years but didn’t live together for the last 10 years; he could not cope with his addiction. I tried to find a new partner, at first in my hometown, and then in my home country, but all the offers I was getting from Russian men were not acceptable to me. In Russia unmarried men of my age are usually in a poor physical shape; they don’t look after themselves and earn very little. I don’t feel attracted to such men, and I don’t want to marry a much younger man. This is why I decided to broaden my search. I hope that with the help of your site I will be able to meet a man with whom I can be happy.

Nadia, 25 – manager in an oil company from Almaty, Kazakhstan (university graduate speaking 3 languages, never married, no kids): why I seek a husband abroad

I live in a Muslim country (Kazakhstan) although I am a Christian. Certainly, our country is not as fanatic as the countries of Middle East but the basics of the Muslim culture have their effect on men. With all my respect to all religions and cultures, some of them are 100% opposite to my principles, family values and the role of a woman in a family. I am 25 and in my country this is the age when I am starting to become not young enough; I am getting close to the critical age where a woman can no longer find a partner for marriage. Our men are a mix of the Muslim culture with the hang-ups of the Soviet past. A woman in a family and a relationship has no vote; also every man has 50 relatives that the wife is expected to serve and please. A wife in a Kazakh family is a maid; she is usually not allowed to work and often is requested to wear a headscarf. Even if a young family can afford their own home, due to traditions they often have to live with the husband’s parents. Everything that is a norm for a European is a shame for Kazakhs. Just as well, our men are not an example of faithfulness. But let’s leave those national peculiarities of the family values; our men are unable to court a woman (and don’t even try), cannot love, are removed from romanticism and non-material values, and most often have no interests or hobbies. However, I must say most of them are well educated and very well off financially, which for me doesn’t change the essence of the problem. I travel abroad from time to time and during my last trip I had the chance to compare the attitude of western men towards women to our local cultural norms and it’s heaven and earth! I am writing all this not because I am unhappy with my life or don’t have a good life standards (I do); all my girlfriends who are Muslim agree with me on these matters. This is why I decided to join this website.

Sveta*, 29 – manager from Siberia, Russia (university graduate, divorced with no kids): why seeking foreign men

Mentality, culture, climate, life standards

Tanya*, 39 – manager from Russia (university graduate, divorced with 2 children): why I seek a husband abroad

Personally, I don’t have such a goal, to find specifically a FOREIGN husband. I simply decided to use this opportunity and broaden my search. I don’t limit it by Russian Federation; I am looking for my soul mate among all the men in the world. If men lived on 5 planets, I would search on all of them!

Olga, 40 – accountant from Siberia, Russia (university graduate, never married, no kids): why I seek a husband abroad

I am seeking a husband abroad because in my city there are practically NO unmarried, sober men (not abusing alcohol). I am attracted to western men because they enjoy learning new things, have strong family values (which I appreciate) and lead a healthier life style.

Alex*, 25 – psychologist from Siberia, Russia (university graduate speaking 3 languages, never married, no kids): why I am dating western men

Because western men generally treat women better, respect and value women more. Many western men admire Russian women – in Russia we can only dream about that!

Larisa*, 35 – teacher from Siberia, Russia (university graduate speaking 3 languages, divorced with 1 child): why I seek husband abroad

I have many friends and family members living outside Russia and they are very happy with their life. I've been abroad many times and I enjoy it there; my mentality is not Russian but rather cosmopolitan. In Russia, there are many men who abuse alcohol and drugs, have low moral values, don't look after themselves. I feel I have no perspective in Russia, with lack of order in everything, abundant corruption and unfair compensation for one’s work.

Natalie, 32 – manager from Moscow, Russia (university graduate speaking 3 languages, never married with 1 child): why I decided to seek a husband abroad

Personally I decided to seek a husband abroad because Russian men have completely discredited themselves: freeloaders, homosexuals, alcoholics, mentally unstable. They don’t want a family.

Marina*, 40 – medical doctor from Kazakhstan (university graduate speaking 4 languages, divorced with 1 child): why I search for a husband abroad

My search has been long and so far without results; I am looking for someone who will be a part of me. I tried different agencies but still to no avail. Sometimes I feel like I can do it no more. But I know that I will find someone who will be my soul mate. My friends married western men through your agency and are very happy.

Nailya, 46 – medical doctor from Russia (university graduate, divorced with a grown up child): Why Russian women seek husbands abroad Because most Russian men don’t value women; they treat them as servants or toys to entertain with. A good American man would build an equal partnership and value the woman and the things she does for him.

Natalia*, 37 – actress from Ekaterinburg, Russia (university graduate, never married, no kids): why I am looking for a husband abroad

I am looking for a husband abroad because I am getting close to 40 and I have little chance to find a good man, capable and financially secure, here in Russia: there are not many good and responsible men, and men’s attitude towards women is just horrible, no respect, no help. I want to see the world with my man, travel, live in normal conditions in our own home and not a small rented apartment; the size of Russian pensions is scary and attitude towards elderly is poor, and of course I want my kids to have a better future! I pray to God I’ll have children one day… It’s also really interesting and exciting to find your soul mate on the other end of the world!

Tatiana, 42 – economist from Belarus (university graduate, divorced with 1 child)

Why Russian women seek husbands abroad? Most likely because the majority of our men drink, and if you hadn’t gotten married by the age of 20, you would most likely be alone; and if you are divorced with a child, then your chance to re-marry is practically zero. (Although I must say that western men also aren't too willing to contact someone like me, I am usually getting mails from men either 20 years older or much younger than me, and virtually nothing men in between….) In my country by the age of 40 most good men are either married or if not and they have even a small permanent income, they seek much younger women… Most local men look at the exterior, does the woman have a Hollywood figure and long legs, plus her own home and income, so that they can live from the wife (that's happened to me).

Elena*, 40 – designer from Siberia, Russia (university graduate, divorced with 1 child): why I seek a foreign man for a husband

I joined an international dating site to broaden my search. If I can find a husband in Russia, great! If I find him abroad, this is great, too. I have high requirements; most Russian men don’t meet them. "No matter how bad, at least he’s mine" - this philosophy is not for me; I had one like this already. I want to meet a man who is on my level in all regards.

Irene, 26 – working for an oil company in Moscow, Russia (university graduate speaking 4 languages, never married, no kids): 5 reasons why I seek western men

1) In Russia, there are no single men who are normal, educated, look after themselves and respect women.
2) I absolutely abhor Russian men’s looks (round formless faces)
3) Russian men are unable to even make a step toward a relationship, not to mention courting or trying their best for a relationship.
4) Most men’s finances leave a big room for improvement…
5) My mother lives overseas, so I want to be closer to her; no sense in looking for someone here.

Mila*, 25 – medical doctor from Ukraine (university graduate, never married, no kids): why I seek a husband abroad

I seek a husband or an opportunity to find love abroad because it broadens my search. I am soon turning 26 and I have never been married, only once was in love and unsuccessfully :) I don’t want to get married just because I’m supposed to. Many men like me but unfortunately, for me they are just friends. I think the reason may be because I am a homebody. The reason may be my town; it’s countryside and most young men are of the corresponding level. I also think there are known factors which resulted in lower numbers of men as compared to women in Ukraine and the intellectual level of men. I am not that naive to think that things are some kind of “special” abroad but I believe one should be hopeful and keep searching, knowing you’ve done all you could.

Christina*, 30 - Medical doctor from Russia (university graduate, divorced with no kids): why I seek a husband abroad

In Russia there are limited numbers of men who are goal oriented, hardworking, reliable, with strong family values, who are prepared to take responsibility for their children. I think that Russian women spoiled Russian men beyond reparable. Just looks how western and Russian women dress. In Russia, even the worst man feels like he’s a king, even though in the west no one would want him. Children are mostly brought up by single mothers, who have to do everything without any help from the ex-husband / father, and that’s a bad example for growing boys. As the situation becomes worse with every year, I think good men will become even more of a rarity. The situation in Russia is unstable and no one knows what to expect. I want to have children and they need stability and security to have a good future; I feel in Russia it’s not possible.

Dasha*, 31 - manager from Russia (university graduate, never married, no kids): why I decided to find a western man

I decided to find a western man because our men are limited in their views, especially where I live in the Ural, they are total degenerates. Many still think in Soviet terms, although USSR dissolved 20 years ago. Plus our men are so spoiled by beautiful women, they have 5 girlfriends each! They don’t want or need serious relationships. I want to find a positive and honest approach and family values. 

Selina*, 45 – writer from Russia (university graduate, divorced with a grown up child): why I seek a husband abroad

I will try to answer your question… It’s my second registration on your site in 5 years. The first attempt was unsuccessful. I was corresponding with an American man for about 2 years. His letters were nice and cultured, with photos (he was a widower). We talked on the phone, several times I tried to set up a meeting but he always was finding some excuses although in his later letters he was calling me his "fiancée"… Then I went to Sydney, Australia for a visit; he promised me he’d get there to meet me… that was the end. He just vanished. You know, for me it was such a moral demise and disappointment; for 3 years I could not even bear a thought about dating online. 

In my hometown I have no opportunities to find a decent partner for one simple reason: I live here for all my life, work in media and have my own media business. I am an author and a presenter of the most popular radio station. So, having created my image of a "popular lady", I significantly limited my circle of communication with "simple men". Normal men are simply scared of my "popular" image, and men below average are not interesting to me. I would like to see next to me a man who is intelligent, successful and financially secure, as I am used to this level of life… So, it's a vicious circle; my town is small and provincial; everyone knows everybody. Good men of my age aren't lying on the roads to pick up; they are tightly held. Men who aren't good are not interesting to me… I am lucky that my daughter is living in Sydney, Australia. My dream is to move closer to her. And if I could find a special man that I could love and who would love me, this would be just dreams come true… 

Well, there was also the second unsuccessful attempt in online dating; again, we met on your site. In his letters he was such an intellectual, with high moral values… we were writing to each other for 3 months. Then he told me he was going to Thailand for the New Year’s Eve. I was excited as it’s not too far away from where I live, asked him if he would like me to get there at the same time, so we could meet. He was trying to swirl around at first and didn’t seem too excited but then said, OK. I should have taken more notice back then… So, we met; he made me to move to his extremely expensive hotel and hired me a room next to his. I don’t know what did I do wrong; but in the morning when I woke up and went down to the reception, they gave me his enormous bill to pay… 

Honestly, after two such experiences with foreign "admirers" my hope of finding an honest, intelligent and successful man has nearly vanished… But I am not a type who gives up. I am still trying. I apologize for the long letter; it's just very personal. I have a great deal of respect to your site and your very professional and effective approach.

Julia, 41 – music teacher from Baku, Azerbaijan (5 degrees, speaking 3 languages, never married, no kids): why I seek a husband abroad

I decided to seek a husband abroad because in my country (Azerbaijan) most men prefer to marry women of Azerbaijan nationality. Also, after the age of 25 it’s nearly impossible to find a single man here; this is why I decided to look for a partner abroad.

Tanya*, 28 – designer from the south of Russia (university graduate, never married, no kids): why I seek western men

I tried to date and live with Russian men but I can’t accept their "Russian" laziness. They don’t want to work, don’t want to take responsibility for a family, and their attitude to having and raising children is different to mine. Not all of them, but the good ones are already taken. Western men or Russian men living in western countries have a more responsible attitude to life. Of course, there are marginal cases everywhere but I feel most western men are more mature.

Elena, 37 – accountant from Ukraine (university graduate, divorced with 1 child): why I seek western men

1. Women outnumber men in Ukraine.

2. I could not meet 'my' man in my home country; why not broaden my search? I can meet 'my' man anywhere.

Natasha*, 25 – student from south of Russia (never married, no kids): why I want to marry a foreign man

I have many friends who married foreigners and live abroad. They told me about their life and how happy they are; I also lived abroad for some time and I know from my own experience the difference in the level of life and culture. I also want my children have a good future and good education. I value understanding and respect, and it’s impossible to get from Russian men.

Tatyana, 41 – business owner from Ukraine (university graduate, divorced with a grown up child): why I seek foreign men Foreign men fly thousands of miles to meet us, and local men won’t even come to a nearby town…

Tatyana*, 35 – writer from Ukraine (university graduate, divorced with 1 child): why I am looking for a husband abroad

I will tell you why I am looking for a husband abroad… In my city all Ukrainian men of my age are heavy drinkers, and men who are 10+ years older are impotent. I have registered on your site where all men are foreigners and their letters usually start with, "Hello dear" or "Hi beautiful"; letters from our men would usually start, "Your pics are too cold, how about something hotter…" or "Hey pussycat, write me something you cutie pie" (do I need to comment?) For 3 years of Internet dating I met an American man and we fell in love; I went to America to join him but just before our wedding he was diagnosed with an incurable cancer (too late) and he said, no wedding. I was ready to look after him for as long as necessary but he decided he didn’t want to destroy my life, put me back on the plane to Ukraine, at the airport we both were crying non-stop… I am crying even now thinking about it. I took some time off, then went back online, Skype meetings etc… A French man visited me, he was here for a sex tour; I have no grudges, once a year sex is OK, too, with a man who smells of a nice perfume (as compared to the local men). Then I had a local man visiting; have you tried eating an over sugary chocolate candy generously sprinkled with salt? Can’t swallow and feel sorry to spit it out…:) An Englishman visited me – he was a good man, but we were too different and I could not pretend I had feelings just for the sake of a country. Next, I met 3 Ukrainian men; one lived in America but the mentality was still the same; in 3 days he turned into a 100% local bloke with all the twists, demands and mannerism… I sent him back! Now I am registered on 12 international dating sites and only looking for a foreigner! Enough of local men for me! They should be looking for western women; our men need constant discipline and a short leash!!! And Moscow men have more arrogance than any men I know. Many local men were stringing me along for months… entertain them through Skype, "I am coming soon", "could not get there"… I can write a book about my experiences. I now have a tactic: from the first letter I tell men that I am only looking for a serious relationship and don’t have time to waste, and set a meeting on Skype. In the second Skype chat (not after 3 months) I ask them, dear, do you think we could meet in real life or will we only have virtual communication? Some start making arrangements straight away, some promise to come in a month, others say, "Oh dear, I love you very much but tickets are too expensive right now… or my vacation will be only in 9 months"… It’s more and more difficult to meet men online; 3 years ago I could spend 1 hour a day, now I am spending 5-6 hours a day trying to find someone. (Thanks for listening, now that I told my story it feels easier, like after a confession.) Thanks to your agency for your great help, what would we women do without you? And as for the computer, as soon as I get married, I will give it away and my life in Internet will be a distant memory, like a war…

Katerina, 36 – librarian from Ukraine (university graduate, divorced with 2 kids): why I seek a husband abroad

Marriage to a foreign man for me is not just a marriage certificate. It is the beginning of a new, happy, unusual and promising life, in which I will feel secure, confident, excited, and most of all protected. I am interested in other cultures, languages, traditions and customs, a different lifestyle. I want to build my new relationship on the base of my interest to my new man, who will be the embodiment of all the things new and different.

Katya*, 34 – PR manager from Russia (university graduate speaking 3 languages, never married, no kids): why I am looking for a husband abroad

I am looking for a husband abroad because Russian men are too relaxed, they don’t want to work and earn money, don’t want a family, because women in Russia significantly outnumber men. This is why our men are constantly squeezing a new girl in a corner. Married Russian men, almost 100% of them have affairs and lovers! Try to attend a corporate function in a Russian company; everybody gets drunk and what happens in the bathrooms, it’s just indescribable. It’s the law. It’s a wide spread virus!!! I am from St. Petersburg, have a successful career. Women like me aren’t in demand because there are brainless dolls who are ready for anything just to think, “Wow, I have a boyfriend…”. And it doesn’t matter if this boyfriend is married or not… In the streets you can see men drinking beer out of cans, with potbellies and greasy hair… If he’s in the office, the same picture: tummy hanging to the knees, after work - pub and drinking! A woman for them is just a kitchen maid. 

Wow… )))) What a horror picture. But that’s how it is.

Svetlana*, 24 – teacher from Kasakhstan (university graduate speaking 4 languages, never married, no kids): why I am looking for western men

I am looking for a western man because compared to the local men western men seem more caring, affectionate and more interesting to communicate with.

Mila, 42 – pharmacist from Moscow, Russia (university graduate, divorced with 1 child): why I want to meet a western man

I work in a predominantly female environment; I am rather reserved, calm and not a fond of loud parties. I read a lot, love art, needlework and good movies. This altogether doesn’t assist in meeting a good (how I see it) man. I tried a Russian dating site; the result was shocking and I can't even think about going back. Half of the men who wrote to me were looking for a place to live, because either the wife kicked them out or they came to Moscow looking for jobs, or they simply don't want to work but want a roof over their heads and free food. The other half was looking for a quick non-obliging sex. And not even a single man who could be, more or less, considered as a candidate. Which is understandable: no one kicks out a good man or divorces him; women hold on to the good ones. This is why I decided to try to meet someone here, on this site; but unfortunately, no results as yet. Men don't notice me and don't write to me. I write to men myself but my letters are either unread or deleted. I still hope for the best. Thank you for your work and caring for us, women seeking a simple female happiness.

Lina*, 29 – manager from Ukraine (university graduate, never married, no kids): why I seek foreign men

My friend married a foreigner. They are very happily married and as they say, they live in perfect harmony. I think that foreign men are more courteous and gallant.

Julia*, 26 – teacher from Ukraine (university graduate, never married, no kids): why I decided to seek a husband abroad

I decided to seek a husband abroad because at home, I mean in my country, I couldn’t find the right man. I was very unlucky; the men I met were dishonest. I don’t know what is going to come out of it, but I do have friends and family members who married foreigners and they are happy in their marriages. This is why I decided to try it as well; why not? 

Tanya, 41 – real estate agent from Ukraine (college graduate, never married, no kids): response to the survey why Russian women seek husbands abroad

First, I want to say thank you for your work and help, for the chance you gave me to find my soul mate, thank you very much! I haven’t met my special man yet but I don’t give up and I believe in my good luck and that somewhere out there is my special man! In regard to the question why I am looking for a husband abroad, because in my country I only saw disappointments, lies, rudeness, egoism and hypocrisy from men. I decided to seek my man abroad and I believe there is somewhere a man who needs my love, care and affection.

Natalia*, 22 – economist from Belarus (university graduate, never married, no kids): why I seek a husband abroad

I decided to seek a husband on this site because our men don’t value women, don’t pay much attention to us and in general, aren’t suitable! Foreign men are more attentive, sincere and cultured! For them a woman is indeed a fragile creature who needs care, affection, attention, love and knowing that her man needs her like air! Thank you! 

Alena*, 35 – manager from Ukraine (college graduate speaking 4 languages, never married, no kids): why seek a husband abroad

I seek a husband abroad because I want my future children to have the opportunity to live in a free civilized country, and also from my own personal experience I know that foreign men are more cultured, goal oriented and financially stable as compared to our local men, which means they are better candidates for marriage.

Elena*, 34 – manager from Russia (university graduate, never married, no kids): why I seek foreign men

In a few words, my intuition tells me that my womanly happiness is somewhere very, very far away from Russia; this is why I am on the site. Also, one of my friends married a foreign man and lives in Netherlands. 

Helena*, 33 – teacher from Ukraine (divorced with 2 children): why I prefer foreign men

I am tired of arrogance and disrespect of our men if they have money; the more money, the more arrogance and disrespect. In Ukraine laws change every day, although the laws that are already there are not followed through. I want to be loved and cherished, not necessarily by a foreign man - if it’s my countryman, I will be happy, too!

Karina*, 49 – programmer from Russia (university graduate, divorced with a grown up daughter): why I am looking for a husband abroad

My answer to your question is: most men in Russia are just too SPOILT!!! They mostly disrespect women... unfortunately Russian women spoil their men nowadays too much :). They even woo men instead of men wooing them, which is a shame. I had a chance to communicate with foreigners and I know they treat women so much better! 

Nadezhda, 29 – designer from Kiev, Ukraine (university graduate, never married, no kids): Why I seek a western man

I am real woman & all pictures in my profile are mine. I am looking for the right life partner. I am interested in a serious relationship. I do not like men form Ukraine, because most of them are rude, they drink vodka 24/7, they do not respect women and they even beat women. Most of my friends married foreign men, they relocated and created families, most have children and all of them are happy. That's why I decided to look for my future husband outside of Ukraine. I am an interior designer and I like my job, but family is more important for me than my career. I am ready to relocate, create a family and have children in future.

Nata*, 22 – accountant from Russia (university graduate, never married, no kids): why I am looking for a foreign man

I'm looking for a foreign man (especially Norwegian) because:
- it seems to me that Scandinavians are more responsible and have qualities I respect
- most of Russian guys are very shallow, they're always in search of another adventure
- I'm in love with Norway and want to live there.

Lisa*, 30 – police officer from Russia (university graduate speaking 3 languages, never married, no kids): why Russian women seek husbands abroad

In short, in my region there are 10 women to 4 men. From those 4 men: 1 is an alcoholic, 1 is a drug addict, and 1 has a criminal record. So, I feel it’s worth to give it a try to find a good husband abroad; I have nothing to lose!

Lena*, 23 – economist from Russia (university graduate speaking 3 languages, never married, no kids): why Russian women seek foreign men

• Most foreign men are family oriented and have strong family values. Russian men prefer easy and free relationships without any obligations.Foreign men can court a woman and consider it normal to take a woman out for dinner for the first date, bring a small box of chocolates or flowers. Russian men think that giving a woman flowers is a waste of money and many simply don’t know how to open a door in front of a woman.
• Most foreign men are more mature and conscious about marriage; they first ensure they have a stable income and a place to live and only then decide to start a family. Many Russian men marry to have the woman provide for them, they don’t feel they need to provide for a family or have a permanent job/income, or even as little as strive to have it.
• Many foreign men are goal oriented, lead active life style, strive to improve themselves, have interests and hobbies, develop through their whole life.
   
  P.S. I don’t want to degrade or humiliate Russian men; all Russian men are different, as well as not all foreign men are that good. My observations are strictly of a personal nature from my own experience with Russian and American men I know.

Tatiana*, 30 – manager from Kazakhstan (university graduate speaking 4 languages, divorced with 1 child): why I want to meet a foreign man for marriage

I have been married before and have a child. Unfortunately, I no longer trust men here; I am chattered by their family values and mentality; I see total degradation of men. I do to get married and I want to be loved and respected; I want to change my life. Men are men everywhere; there are only differences in the color of skin and the languages they speak, but this is OK. I WANT TO TRY.

Rimma*, 44 – economist from Russia (university graduate, divorced with grown up kids): why Russian women seek husbands abroad

I am looking for a husband abroad because my daughter lives in the USA and I would like to live closer to her. I visited her several times and I could see and experience how people live there and treat each other, including men. American men are kind and sincere; they lead healthy life style, exercise and travel, they drink very little. I like this and would love to have a reliable friend and partner in life. I am compassionate, I love life, I enjoy exercising and dancing, I am healthy and I really want to love and be loved.

Ana*, 38 – manager from Ukraine (university graduate, divorced with a grown up child): why I seek foreign men

- Different mentality
- Lack of good men locally

Olesya, 40 – editor from Moscow, Russia (university graduate speaking 5 languages, divorced with 1 child): why I am looking for a western man

Humor often reflects life.

Here is the translation of an unserious Russian poem suggesting the answer to the serious question why Russian girls (and me) are on EM.

Russian men are distinguished by mustaches and beards,
And by the ability to discuss important matters,
Twenty percent of them are males-who-go-to-bed-with-males,
Forty percent are lovers of vodka,
Thirty percent are lovers of viagra,
Ten persent are really messed up in the head.
In total, this gives us one hundred percent,
And we have nothing left.

The poem was the answer to one popular poet’s malicious poem, devoted to women:

Women wear stockings and panti-tights,
They are not interested in issues of culture.
Twenty percent of them are idiots,
Thirty percent are stupid fools,
Forty percent of them are psychopaths,
In total, this gives us 90.
Ten percent is left for us,
But to choose among them is not easy.

To sum it up, to meet Russian men
who respect other people... and women are included in this number ;-)
(unlike the poet mentioned above),
who do their work rather than oratorize ;-),
who respect their country rather than throw mud at it,
who are kind and optimistic, sure of themselves, life and future,
to meet such men is harder than to meet a kookaburra in the Arctic.

Yelena, 40 – administrator from Moscow, Russia (college graduate, never married, no kids): why I started looking for a western man

Personally, I started looking for a western man when one of Russian men, we are the same age, told me that I should be thinking of my soul and not about a marriage and definitely forget about children. He was very blunt and arrogant. I looked around and realized that Russian men are too spoiled with all the attention we Russian women give them. A Russian woman over 30 has an inferiority complex if she is not married. A Russian man, even the most useless, thinks he is a gift to any woman if he looks her way. I have been to many other countries and seen the genuine interest in me from western men, but at that time I had a barrier because of my poor English. I decided to learn the language and put a lot of effort into that, so, now when I communicate with men from many countries and continents I am confident, I know I am attractive and sexy, and I don’t lose hope to have my own children. And no matter what any Russian man says, their words can't hurt me. I am sure I will meet my man. Thank you for your site and your work.

Inna*, 24 – student from Riga, Latvia (divorced with 1 child): Why I am looking for a husband abroad

Why, because western men are different – they are kinder, more intelligent, and want to meet a woman with serious intentions, for marriage.

Tanya*, 26 – linguist from Kiev, Ukraine (university graduate speaking 4 languages, never married, no kids): Why women seek husbands abroad

There are several reasons why I decided to seek a husband abroad. First, the demographics; there are many more women in my country than men. Second, I want to find a man with strong family values and for our men, unfortunately, this is more an exception than the rule. Also I want my man value and appreciate me and care about me (and I will do the same for him!) as opposed to thinking that I must be happy that he looked at me, which is typical for Ukrainian men. Those are the most important reasons. I hope that with your help I will find my man soon!

Oksana, 41 – accountant from Ukraine (university graduate, divorced with a grown up child): Why seeking foreign men Foreign men are more responsible towards marriage. They don’t talk about financial problems and that they are not ready, financially and morally, to get married. They respect women more.

Simona, 26 – seller from Kurgan, Russia (college graduate, never married, no kids): Why Russian women seek foreign men 

Hi! I am looking for a man abroad because I believe that foreign men in general are more reliable, family oriented, loving and caring towards children and always help their wives to look after kids. I believe that western men are open, sincere and honest. They lead a healthy life style and mostly don’t have harmful habits. It’s a well-known fact that in Russian we have 9 men for 10 women. And I had cases where I liked a man only to discover that he is either married or already has a girlfriend, which was sad. In western countries, it’s the opposite. Also, I believe that life abroad is much better and there is more confidence in the future, for both my future children and myself.

More personal stories from Russian women why they seek western men - Page 2

* Not her real name

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